


Delirium

by gabrielreyesplsloveme



Series: Whumptober2019 [3]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: Bloodbugs - Freeform, Delirium, Drugs, Gen, Hallucinations, James is so done, Lucy and Duncan are mentioned, Needles, Scolding, chems, don't do drugs kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-06
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:08:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25738582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gabrielreyesplsloveme/pseuds/gabrielreyesplsloveme
Summary: Grief is a common emotion in the wasteland but as common as it is, it still packs a punch. MacCready, consumed by it, takes some chems and alcohol and does some stupid things that almost results in his death.
Relationships: Robert Joseph MacCready & Male Sole Survivor
Series: Whumptober2019 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1504373
Kudos: 5





	Delirium

**Author's Note:**

> I could post these once a day, but executive dysfunction said "No"  
> Anyways hope yall like it <3

Losing a loved one is hard. Everyone knows that you can move on, but you never truly forget the pain that was caused. And as the anniversary of Lucy's death approaches, it's fresh in MacCready mind.

MacCready doesn't drink much. Less after his son was born. Even rarer does he ever do chems, but his kid's not here now. The only thing that is, is the memory of Lucy's death looping through his brain over and over again. He needs something to numb the pain, so here he is, guzzling down bottle after bottle and shooting up with cheap chems he got a few days ago in Goodneighboor. No matter how much he tries to dull his senses, he still can't get Lucy's terrified face out of his mind.

Having enough of this self wallowing, MacCready decides to go let off some steam the best way he knows how. By killing giant mutated creatures.

It doesn't take long for him to find something to shoot at - never does in the wasteland really. There are always bloodbugs around Sanctuary, and they would stand no chance against someone of his skill. At least, they wouldn't if he was sober.

All that MacCready was really doing was screaming incoherent curses and missing the majority of his shots, giving the two bugs left an opportunity to jump on him. They latched themselves onto his abdomen and started to suck. Immediately, both the screaming, and self-preservation kicked in for MacCready, and he shot both bugs at point blank, killing them instantly but leaving him bleeding to death.

He pushes the dead bugs off, but he was still panicking. The blood loss mixed with sketchy chems and alcohol was getting to him and he was starting to see things. It seems that no matter where he turned, he could clearly hear Lucy's voice blaming him for her death. He looked around wildly but couldn't find the source of the voice. He started running, it didn't matter which direction, he just wanted away, but no matter what, he could still hear her voice. It got louder and louder until he couldn't take it anymore and clasps his hands over his ears and squeezed his eyes shut. He stumbles and falls on knees. He opens his eyes and looks down to see his dead wife's face, blood pooling out of her eyes and mouth and gashes crisscrossing her face that were so deep he could hardly recognize her. MacCready turns and pukes in the opposite direction then just curls into a ball and starts crying. At least, he thinks he is. He can't tell because the screaming won't stop and at this point he doesn't know if it's hers or his. All he knows is that he wants it to stop. Please stop. _STOP_. " **STOP** -!"

James sighs and pulls out the needle that was previously filled with sedative out of his friend's neck. He's glad he thought of it before following him here. His next step was to get MacCready to safety and treat his wounds. He sighs yet again and starts dragging his limp body back to Spectacle Island. "What is Goodneighboor selling people these days anyway?"

The next day when MacCready wakes up, it isn't as peaceful as he wishes it was because as soon as James notices the ex-merc's awake, he barges into his room and starts scolding him immediately. "Robert. Joseph. MacCready." He takes a deep breath to control his anger. "I cannot believe you would do something so stupid!" Said man is now currently trying to melt into his pillows, not really wanting to hear this while his hangover is just starting. James has none of this avoided eye contact and moves closer to him until his friend looks at him. "Were you trying to get yourself killed? You're lucky your immune system was boosted by all that fungus you ate as a child or you would've _died_." At this, MacCready looks sightly offended and scoffs. "Of course I wasn't trying to get myself killed! No need to be so mean about it!" He regrets opening his mouth immediately when James turns to glare at him. "Don't you dare raise your voice to me. You know what you did last night was very irresponsible and you should-"

"My grief overwhelmed me! You wouldn't understand-!"

"What about Duncan?" That shut him up. "If I wasn't awake last night and didn't follow you, you would have died. You would have left your son orphaned in this already cruel world, and you wouldn't be there to protect him." His voice dropped to a whisper as he pointed at his friend. "What would you have done then."

Horror and realization dawns on his face as he's speaking. He holds his head in his hands as he realizes that he almost left his son behind for good. After everything he's done up to that point just for Duncan, and he almost threw it all down the drain. God, he's such an asshole.

"I-I'm sorry. God, am I sorry. I'll never do anything that stupid again, I promise you." James hardened steel eyes softened a fraction and he backed away from his space. He pats MacCready on the back as he turns to leave. "Good. I don't ever want to have to be the person that tells your son you're dead. Next time just talk to someone when you feel like that. It'll do you some good. Now get some more rest. I'll wake you up when breakfast is ready." MacCready rolls his eyes at that but settles down in the bed anyway. "Yes dad." He chuckles on his way out, but doesn't comment on it any further. His companion is having a tough enough time as it is. He needs more time to grow as a person and even more time to heal from past wounds. James is just here to make sure he doesn't kill himself along the way, and MacCready is forever grateful for that.

**Author's Note:**

> James is a butt sometimes but he does care about his friends


End file.
